Monday, June 8, 2015

I Came to the Garden Alone... And All is Well!

This past weekend was a little difficult for me.  My beloved husband was out of town, and I was missing him so.  The weather has been so lovely here, and if he had been home, we would have found our way into the cooler mountains for sure.  It actually got up to 97 degrees here yesterday!  Unreal! We usually don't get this kind of weather until mid-July or so.

So... I was alone.  My kids had plans both Saturday and Sunday that didn't involve me.... :(  Which is great, because they are teenagers, and their world is expanding, although it is taking me a little getting used to it!  Usually I don't mind being alone... I find great solace in times of quietness, and look forward to them.  Yet, this weekend, the loneliness was ... well ... just there... !

In my effort to be honest, and real... I don't want my blogging efforts to come across as if I am some sort of superwoman who has it all together.  Simply because that is not life, and it is not reality.  There are highs and lows in our lives, and I want to convey to you that having difficulties and things in our lives that aren't pretty - that is reality.

The difference comes in what we choose to do with those difficulties - that is really the game changer.

And so, this past weekend, the highlight of both my Saturday and Sunday was getting out to water my garden, feed my chickens, and that was about it.  Not real exciting, mind you!  While my kids were out floating down the river in tubes, I was .... home alone.  So, there you have it.  I was having a bit of a pity party for myself!

Anyway, I headed over to our garden (our property where the garden is planted is a short distance from where we live), and began to water my garden.  My loneliness threatened to flow out like the water pouring from the hose.  I felt quite intently the pangs of loneliness as I watered, even though my garden was showing signs of promise...



The garden was making progress, slowly but surely!  The potatoes are popping out of the ground, and sporting their lovely green tops.



Some of my tomato plants already have blooms!




The tomatoes seem very happy in the greenhouse.  I have a few plants in the middle of the greenhouse that I will plant once they get a little bigger.



I only planted 12 corn this year, because I promised my husband I would keep my garden small.  They seem to be growing happily along as well!



The raspberry bushes that we planted last year have dug in their heels, and have produced a large amount of blooms!  We should have quite a nice crop of raspberries next month!


As I finished watering the garden... I had nowhere to go, and time on my hands, and the loneliness was mounting.  Those who know me well probably have never seen this side of me, because I stay so busy. Yet today, I couldn't get away from the fact that my husband was many hundreds of miles away, and not here with me.  And the loneliness was quite overwhelming my heart.


I found a comfortable lawn chair, and got my Bible out the truck, along with my trusty camera, and filled up my water bottle with some cold water from our well, and found a nice shady spot to relax in.


I knew I was long overdue for this talk with the Lord.  As I closed my eyes, and began to talk to the Lord, the tears were flowing, and the pity party was just getting started.
 
I opened my eyes when I heard some cackling, and realized our lone turkey had arrived to keep me company.  I realized even in that moment that she was lonely, just as I was.  For some reason, she has been kicked out of her gaggle, and wanders around our property throughout the day, by herself. Sometimes other hens will come to visit, but she never leaves with them.


I was surprised at her visit, because I had found my shady spot just a few yards from where I had dropped some bird seed on the ground for her.  But she did come!

As I watched her peck away, and cackle, I wondered what she would think if I talked to her.   So I gently began to talk to her.  She looked my way, and kind of backed off.   Then I thought maybe I would sing instead. So...


...  I began to sing an old song... "Shut in with God in a secret place, there in the spirit beholding his face, gaining more power to run in the race, I long to be shut in with God."


As I began to sing that song, she stopped as if she was listening for a moment, and then went back to eating.  I continued to sing, and as I sang, I felt as if the heavens were opening up, and the presence of the Lord was just bathing me and covering me in His beauty and spirit.   As the tears flowed, I felt the overwhelming loneliness leave me, and it was replaced with the sweet peace from the Lord.  Even Ms. Turkey felt it, because she stayed and quietly pecked and cackled away.


I looked around me at the beautiful scene set before my eyes, and began to praise the Lord.  My heart was so full of Him, and so full of praise.  As the trees seemed to bow, sway and move to the wind, and the gentle breeze caressed the grass, and my turkey friend continued to share my company... the sweet spirit of the Lord moving in my heart caused such joy to come, where there had just moments ago been the perfect lineup for a pity party.  Instead of having a pity party... things changed when the King of Glory arrived... and the pity party never even got started... but the praise party continued for several hours!



Then I began to sing... "I come to the garden alone... where the dew is still on the roses... and the voice I hear... falling on my ear... is so sweet the birds hush their singing.... And He walks with me and He talks with me... and He tells me I am His own... and the joy we share as we tarry there.... none other... has ever known!"



Oh what beauty it was to experience the words of that song even as I sang them... and I knew the great Master Gardener had stopped by for a visit... and oh what joy it was!  Now... tears were flowing... but they weren't tears of loneliness.  They were tears of joy springing up from a well deep inside my soul filled to overflowing by His presence.



I opened my eyes and realized that my turkey friend had decided she had eaten her full.  She carefully made her way back to the cover of the woods, and then the quiet stillness pervaded.  In the stillness of the moment, as the trees swayed, and the grass danced... I knew He had walked beside me, was behind me, and before me.  Whatever I face... He faces with me.  Whatever emotions course through me... He understands.  Whatever I don't understand... He knows.  I am safe with Him! "I will never leave you nor forsake you".



Our earthly relationships will never satisfy us, like being in His presence will.  While I still miss my beloved husband acutely.... one moment in the presence of the King assured me that He knows.  He cares.  And all is well.  He removed the sting of loneliness, and replaced it with His peace.  He stopped the pity party in its tracks.



I've come to learn that pity parties never really work for me.  I've tried to have a few, and always the Lord comes, and tenderly shows me how much He loves me, and instead... the pity turns into praise. When I look in wonder at the majesty of his creation.... there is praise that rolls up in my heart and spreads itself forth in song.  Praise for the One who created!  Praise for the One who comforts!  Praise for the One who knows!





When the time came for me to leave my shady spot in the garden with the Lord... I was sad.  Yet, it was time for a meal to be prepared, and for sweet fellowship with friends who were coming by our home soon.  Oh, it was hard to leave... my heart was so full of the feast that the Lord prepared for me in the garden.... but it was time to go.



And as I left, there was a song in my heart, a joy that had been renewed, and a peace like no other.



And as I drove home I thought... it was worth every lonely moment, every one... just to spend those hours with the Lord, and to be comforted and reassured by Him that all was well.  And it is.  In Him... all is well!  

My circumstances had not changed.... but my outlook and perspective on those circumstances had.  And that is why a believer can face uncertain days, and difficult problems in life... not because we are better or worse than anyone else, but because we can look at the problems and difficulties knowing that in Him... all is well.  He is the only One who can calm and cease the existing storm.  He is the only One who knows what the future holds.  He is the only One that can bring peace in the very midst of the storm... And He is the reason we can face uncertain days... because in Him, all is well!

24 comments:

  1. What a beautiful post! I think it is so important to realize that with the Lord we never are truly alone. I always feel so close to him when I am in the outdoors. Hubby and I are on vacation and we took a hike on Sunday. Although we didn't attend our regular church meeting I definitely felt close to God! I love that you just opened up your heart and sang! Happy to see that you are my neighbor. We live in UT.
    hugs,
    Jann

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    1. Thank you so much for your visit, and understanding of how it is that you can be close to the Lord in places like the great outdoors! I hope that your vacation continues to be wonderful... and yes, we are neighbors, but a few hundred miles - not bad! :) May the Lord's presence continue to grace your day! :)

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  2. I wish I lived nearby...I would have invited you to tea:)
    I understand how you felt. I too feel the desire to run to Jesus when I am lonely. He is a friend that is closer than a brother. Times of being alone really make His presence a gift to treasure. Your garden is a lovely spot and what a delightful entertainment the little turkey proved to be.
    Have a blessed evening...Hugs from Shirley in Virginia

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    1. I too would just love a cup of tea with you as well.. I drink a lot of hot tea, and tea time is even more special when shared with a friend! You and I are at opposite ends of the country, but who knows, maybe one day we can do that! I appreciate your kind words, as always, they delight my heart. I pray the Lord's presence continues to be with you in a special way!

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  3. Oh, this was such a beautiful post to read today...your words touched my heart, as I too experience moments when all I wish to do is 'throw a pity party'! It is all too easy to give in to Satan's lies and indulge in how we are feeling, but God is so much greater! I especially loved how you said...
    ''My circumstances had not changed.... but my outlook and perspective on those circumstances had.''
    This is truly something to remember!

    You have a beautiful garden...I adore gardening, so 'visiting' with you today was a delightful treat - you've inspired me!

    Blessings and love in Jesus!
    Kelly-Anne

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    1. I am not one to feel lonely much as I usually have too much going on! However, now that my children are able to do their own things, this is changing where my time is spent, and it was just what I needed, that time with the Lord to renew my heart... indeed, having a changed attitude about my circumstances made all the difference. God is so good to me! And I am so thankful for your visit today, your words are so precious to me, and I appreciate your deep love for the Lord as well. I just love how blogging has opened up your world to mine, and mine to yours... isn't that wonderful! May the presence of the Lord continue to grace and bless your day in all you do :)

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  4. :-( I'm so sorry you were alone and missing your husband Saturday and Sunday. You would have been more than welcome to come with us Saturday to look at some sheds to remodel into a home. Although... it sounds like your time with the Lord was just right for the time!

    Come by anytime! I may have piles of laundry on my couch, but you're welcome! haha :-)

    ~Raquel
    www.atthenewlyweds.blogspot.com

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    1. Thank you dear friend! You know, it was one of those times where I probably wouldn't have been the best of company either... and it took the Lord to fix my perspective, and I'm so glad He did! I always love to stop by and get my baby fix, and have a cozy talk with you... and you know that your house is always so cozy and inviting, and a pile of laundry on the couch just makes it real, lol! Much love to you, and thank you for your kind words today... praying the Lord blesses you today with all the richness his presence affords! :)

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  5. What a lovely post and one I can totally relate to. We seem to be at the same stage, busy husbands, independent teens. For a mom, who has made her whole life about her family, these are not the easiest of times. Before when my husband traveled, I missed him, but was busy taking care of kids. Now the kids are off with friends, as they should be, but I am alone. It's a new path for sure. Glad you found some comfort!

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    1. Yes, I can tell that you can relate. It is somewhat of a strange place to be in... because normally my time is so full with many things, but this weekend, time seemed to drag. But yes, my time in the garden was just what I needed, and I just feel so thankful that the Lord is able to mend the brokenness in our lives in just a moment. Amazes me! Appreciate your visit today, and sharing about where you are at too. It is a new path for sure, as you said! Hope your day continues to be blessed :)

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  6. I wish I had known. Seems I tried to contact you but didn't hear back and thought you were busy as usual. Next Time, give a call. I get lonely too even though there are usually folks around. Bring your camera or just yourself. g

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    1. Thank you so much for your sweet words, I appreciate it so much! I probably wouldn't have been much company though... and my time with the Lord was exactly what I needed. And look what a difference that time made! I never cease to be amazed at the timing of the Lord and how He works. I'm learning, day by day, to run to Him with the big and small things, and it is quite a journey, this walking by faith! But I wouldn't have it any other way! May the Lord continues to bless your day with His presence! :)

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  7. Oh, how wonderful and tender this post made me feel! I fully understand those few moments or a day that we might feel alone. But as you so beautifully wrote about He the King Of Glory will come when we call and talk to Him! I do think we need to share our small struggles and at times huge struggles so in this we can encourage each other! You are a very special lady and your love for the Lord is precious!
    Hugs, Roxy

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    1. I think all of us at some point or another in our lives can relate to loneliness. However, even in the midst of those moments when we feel so alone, how beautiful it is to be reassured that we are not alone! Indeed He is ever present, beside, behind, and before, and I am learning to run to Him, and trust in Him, more each day. It is an adventure by faith! I appreciate your kind words and visit today, and can witness that the love of the Lord is so very precious in your life too, as I am always blessed by your writings! May the Lord continue to bless you in all you do for Him. Much love! :)

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  8. Love your photos! Your tomato plants look well. For some reason, none of my corn has come up this year!

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    1. Hmm! I wonder if something got in your garden and stole the corn? I had that happen last year. Something ate the corn I planted, several times. This year I decided to start my corn inside, and that worked better. Thanks for stopping by today! :)

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  9. The tears are still flowing...even though I finished reading your post and read some of the comments, too. I can so relate to how you felt that day. I can't hardly bear when my precious husband has to be away from us...I miss so terribly. And our sweet boy is getting older, too...he is now a teenager. Where does the time go?? We blink, and it seems they have grown an inch. I am SO thankful for the fact that he is still as young as he is and still home with us. I pray the years go by slowly and we can enjoy our precious children and every moment with them and our dear husbands. I find solace in my precious hours at Jesus' feet, too...such a dear, faithful, precious Friend who sticks by us no matter what. We can ALWAYS find Him near...no matter what our outward circumstances. So many, many times, I head to our "back room", shut the door, and weep in His arms! I just subscribed to your blog. I so appreciate your sweet spirit. :)

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    1. Thank you so much Cheryl for your wonderful comment, it means so much to me! Indeed, this time where the kids are growing up brings us into a transitional place in our lives, and I'm thankful for the garden experience, indeed Jesus is the most precious Friend we can have, in spite of whatever difficulties life places at our feet. I appreciate your sweet spirit as well, and your comment today really blessed my heart. May your day continue to be blessed and surrounded by the presence of the Lord!

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  10. My sweet friend....your turned your loneliness into something beautiful and precious and you shared that sweetness with us. Oh, what a blessing, joy, and encouragement you are to women around the globe!

    How I pray the Lord richly blesses you! I thank Him for allowing our paths to cross for you are such a wonderful instrument in my life. Love and hugs!

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    1. Thank you Stephanie for your gracious and beautiful words, and for your visit today! I too am so very thankful that blogging has brought you and your mother into my life in such a beautiful way,, and so many other ladies too! I feel rich beyond measure to count you as my friend! Indeed, I am learning to run to Jesus whenever the things of life overwhelm me, and it is such a beautiful thing to learn! I pray the Lord's blessings on your day, and that His presence is near you in a precious way! Much love and hugs! :)

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  11. I loved your post this day, my friend.. Our God is so ever faithful and your words expressed it all so beautifully... May His sweet presence continue to lift you up.. Loved the turkey and the lavender, too.. smile.. xoox

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    1. Indeed the Lord is so faithful in whatever situations we find ourselves in! Sure appreciate your visit today, and am thankful that our paths have crossed! I pray the Lord blesses your life in a rich and beautiful way today, in all you do! Much love and hugs!

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  12. I so appreciate your post this morning. It soothed my heart. Your day could have turned out so different....had you not carried Jesus in your heart to the clearing in the woods. What a powerful message in your post. He turns our tears to joy.
    There will come a day when we won't have to leave His presence....we will bask in His Glory eternally.
    Praise His Name!
    Debbie
    xo

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    1. Oh yes, I can't wait for the day when we won't ever have to leave His presence! It seems that our time here with Him always ends so quickly, and I look forward to that day when it will never end! Indeed, I could have chosen different things to do... but I am learning each day that turning to Jesus first makes all the difference in my heart... Thank you so much for coming by and sharing your heart with me, as I do so appreciate it! I pray the Lord blesses your day in a beautiful and special way! Much love and hugs :)

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Your comments are blessings to me, and I appreciate each and every one, they are precious to me! I appreciate you taking the time to comment on my blog... this is what makes blogging worthwhile! Have a blessed day!